Listeners' Reflections
This is your place to publicly comment on the topics and issues addressed in Speaking of Faith programs. React in a personal way, and put into words what this program meant to you.
Submit Your Reflection about "The Wisdom of Tenderness."
Nuclear Peacefare (Tenderness Radiation) (January 28, 2008)
This program touched me to the core. Listening to the podcast kept drawing me in to a deepening silence, which I could not understand. I went to the website and downloaded the uncut version of the audio presentation. The silence continued to deepen, the attraction began to mystify me. I went back to the website and downloaded the video. Jean Vanier's presence reached through and past the digital reality and transported my consciousness to an awareness of how much I've yet to grow. His radiation
of gentleness, tenderness, and peace at first intimidated me then drew me to understanding why — it is I who must become the change I wish to experience in this world. I thank all involved at SOF for making this presentation possible.
Patrick Scullion
Monona, WI (Listens to SOF Podcast)
A Turning Point (January 4, 2008)
I just listened to your interview with Jean Vanier and I was absolutely moved to the core by his presence and his words. They still echo in my mind and ease into my soul like fresh pure water. Getting in touch with tenderness and compassion and vulnerability ,the acknowledgement of the body, feeling the unity is precisely what I need in my life right now. I'm just amazed once more how we receive what we need the moment we need it (if we pay attention). It was not the first time I heard or talked about these subjects. The difference for me? The mark of truth that only deeply lived experiences can provide! What a wise man! What a beautiful soul! How inspiring! Thank you Krista for your own vulnerability, the way you conducted the interview, the chemistry between the two of you made it all so special, a magical moment for me and, who knows, a turning point in my life!
Katia San Millan
Belmont, NC (Listens to SOF OnDemand)
Beyond Giggling (January 3, 2008)
My name is Dan and I'm the one who chews on steering wheels in reaction to some of your shows. When I discovered that my dental plan would not cover the damages to my teeth, I switched to banging my head against the wall. I ended up having to paint the wall, received a spanking from my wife, and received a good smack from my psychiatrist who gave me an RX prior to striking me. [grin]
However, your program on "The Wisdom of Tenderness" left me feeling in good company when the show ended with the two outstanding individuals involved giggling and obviously in need of adult supervision. I just sat there and grinned because I was sharing in the joyous satisfaction that the truth about the cosmos is that God is only supposed to be there as a playground supervisor. Whenever humanity goes beyond that essence of giggling, problems start.
Dan Richards
Norwalk, CA (KPCC, 89.3 FM)
Touched (January 3, 2008)
I was touched on so many levels by this interview. I have a mentally disabled teenager and I hope that he will find a compassionate and caring community like L'Arche to live in one day.
Diana Welsch
Austin, TX (Listens to SOF OnDemand)
Good Timing (January 3, 2008)
This interview was aired at a particular difficult point in my own life. In listening to this interview with this lovely man again and again, I have found meaning and solace in a time that could have otherwise been simply painful and difficult. He speaks so plainly of life and our frailties. It has helped me to begin to open my heart anew. Thank you Ms. Tippett and the entire staff of SOF. Thank you Jean Vanier.
Robert Morrow
Seattle, WA (Listens to SOF Podcast)
Great Video (December 29, 2007)
I just wanted to thank you for such a heartfelt interview. While watching and listening to you and Jean, I felt my heart become very tender and vulnerable. What a powerful, powerful moment that was! I want to thank you for bringing such quality program to the public. It is people like you with your pointed question and your sense of direction, and Jean with his loving kindness and his rich history — and stories that reveal what it is to be fully human. May God bless you!
Bethsy San Millán
Belmont, NC (WDAV, 90.7 FM)
What Is Important… (December 28, 2007)
I was struck by Jean's final words in the program: "What is important is to become a little friend of Jesus." It struck me as so innocent and simple, yet profound when considering how he has applied this to service in his life.
Ron Farson
O'Fallon, MO (KWMU, 90.7 FM)
A Radio Treasure (December 26, 2007)
I used to enjoy listening to an occasional Sunday morning SOF program when chance found me by my radio. More recently I've made a point to listen to them, which has been made far more practical through my first experience of subscribing to podcasts. I thoroughly enjoy this new world of the Internet, and the wonderful web pages you have created for each program. Indeed, just extraordinary. SOF is a radio treasure which I hope will have a very long life with Krista Tippett leading the way.
With respect to the uncut audio versions of interviews, I have come to find them a real bonus providing a richness and color that is not as well realized in the 53 minute radio programs.
William Bitting
St. Louis, MO (KWMU, 90.7 FM)
I Was There (December 24, 2007)
I was a retreatant (and I am a former L'Arche Chicago assistant) on the weekend that you interviewed Jean Vanier at Bishop Claggett. I share with you the joy that I heard come through your interview with Jean (I skipped the one-hour program and headed straight for the unabridged version). There is so much of it that I love. I nearly cried when he told the story of his niece dying from AIDS because of what he said to her about her kindness. Like you said, he just knows from his experience.
Brendan Crowe
Springfield, VA (Listens to SOF OnDemand)
What Meaning Must Find? (December 24, 2007)
I am 23 years old, a senior in college where I am majoring in social work. This program truly blessed me. For my course work I had to volunteer at a local homeless shelter. I was amazed and in awe of the residents — the stories, the tales, the sadness, and most of all the interaction with the other residents and the staff members that worked at the shelter. These men and women had no place to be, nowhere to go, and not a dime in their pockets. However, they tended to be drawn to the staff and volunteers that were there day in and day out.
I am blind, not totally, but my sight is poor. While my stay at this shelter only was but four months, I found something with those residents and clients and staff that I do not find on the everyday streets of society that we walk. I have often pondered what the connection was? Perhaps, it was indeed kindness, caring, and understanding. But it was much more — truly loving human beings. I am assured most could not recall who is was, but I remember each and everyone that touched me. As with L'Arche, we all must love unconditionally no matter the barrier.
Nikki Bare
West Jefferson, NC (WFDD, 88.5 FM)
Reaffirming My Decision (December 24, 2007)
I am the mother of a 28-year-old woman with Down syndrome who recently moved into a L'Arche community. I was inspired to hear Jean Vanier's thoughts on people, like my daughter, who distill life to it's most simple form — the asking "do you love me." It took several years for me to discover the gift that my daughter was to me and the rest of my family. We, her family, seek her opinion and company as we live our lives. We call Molly our Zen Master. She speaks only what she knows, and she does not know that what she knows is all there is to know. Thank you for sharing Mr. Vanier's interview with your audience.
Lori Allen
Ames, IA (WOI, 640 AM)
Black and White Film. Brilliant. (December 24, 2007)
I so thoroughly enjoyed the video interview with Jean Vanier — hearing his wonderful thoughts and words and seeing those dancing eyes of compassion. Thank you so very much for the opportunity to hear this wonderful soul. A big thanks for filming this in black and white, what a stroke of genius to do this. While this video world blasts out garish colors at us, it was nice to rest your eyes without color so the voices will have even more resonance. After hearing this interview I wish I could ask him my 10 questions for my new book. Thanks once again for such amazing programming.
Craig M. Renwick
South Pasadena, CA (KPCC, 89.3 FM)
Good Work (December 24, 2007)
Thank you so much for interviewing Jean Vanier. I am a special education teacher and find his view on people, disabled and nondisabled, to be enlightening. He is right — you did your homework and asked him very good questions. His answers are not trite or "preachy," but have the same kind of simple truth that the teachings of Jesus have. Keep up the good work.
Tim McFarland
Salem, OR (Listens to SOF Podcast)
Finding Holiness (December 24, 2007)
Yesterday I listened to your interview with Jean Vanier. He is always so wise, but I was once again impressed with your very gifted way of asking deep questions with respect and honor for your subject. I have heard you do this with people of many religious traditions and customs. Your program helps me try to understand other people's deepest beliefs in a way that I hope others would try to understand mine. Given the power of spirituality and the pressures of religion in the world today, this is an important work of peace.
I look to public radio for entertainment and news; in your program I often find holiness in the subject and in the interviewer as I did in yesterdays interview. Thank you. Peace.
Fr. David Guffey
Santa Monica, CA (KPCC, 89.3 FM)
Life Without Music? (December 23, 2007)
Life with out music? I never need worry again with words and thoughts expressed on this show today. Just sweet music, sweet, sweet, music. Thanks.
Craig Borgesen
Austin, MN (KNSE, 90.1 FM)
Tikkun (December 23, 2007)
I wish i had heard of Jean Vanier and L'Arche during the lifetime and struggles of my older brother — a man of many disabilities who lived through many rejections, who may have perceived my struggles to accept him as he was and my often not so subtle denials. Yet, and in spite of all the challenges, he led a successful life and was much loved by other disabled friends, particularly those with Down syndrome who worked under his supervision. I wonder what a man I would have become had I been touched by that simple wisdom of tenderness toward my own brother. I wonder if by turning to Speaking of Faith this afternoon was my brother's way of signaling that he acknowledges my struggle to deal with my shortcomings and that I still may find a way to repair our incomplete relationship.
René Soraggi
Los Angeles, CA (KPCC, 89.3 FM)
Woke Up Early (December 23, 2007)
I have heard your program before, and was always interested in your subjects, but rarely listened to the full program because it played at 7:00 am — a little too early. Today I got up early because I had injured my ribs in a fall a week ago, and could not sleep. I turned on WKSU like I always do on Sunday morning and caught your program with this very interesting interview that struck a cord with me. When I found out that it was Jean Vanier, I woke up my wife because she has always been a big fan of Vanier ever since she heard him speak when she was in college 40 years ago. We both sat and listened to the program. He is a wise man. One of Vanier's friends, Fr. Jim O'Donnell, has been a leader of a L'Arche community here in Cleveland. Fr. Jim married my wife and I 33 years ago. One of my sisters is severely handicapped, and recently I have begun to view her as more of a blessing than a burden to our family of four brothers and two sisters. Great program. God bless you.
Vince Winslow
Shaker Heights, OH (WKSU, 91.3 FM)
An Unwrapped Gift, Opened (December 23, 2007)
I rarely listen to your program because I am not usually in my car on Sunday morning. But this morning I took a drive and happened to turn on public radio and your program had just started with the interview with Jean Vanier. I was quite surprised because very few people know about Jean Vanier and l'Arche communities and Trosly etc. I parked at a little park overlooking the bay to listen to the program.
How to be brief… I read a book by Henri Nouwen called Journey to Daybreak, which is a personal journal that Henri kept during the year he spent at l'Arche. I did not even seek the book, it happened to be left behind on a bench in a park and I could not find who owned it. I kept it, and it is my most holy book. This was during the most transformative period of my life. I had just moved to Maine, was starting a new job, and just before I left (my wife and children were supposed to move with me a month later), my wife decided she wanted a divorce.
I suffered a great deal, and for some reason I decided to go through with the suffering and get to know the New Testament and pray and establish an intimate relationship with God. It all started one morning when I was not sure if I should kill myself, use drugs, or ask God for his mercy. I decided to pray in my back yard, and all I asked for was that a tiny bit of weight be lifted so that I could get to work, and by keeping my job I might be able to have some degree of custody of my girls. I was so frightened of never living with my girls again. So I prayed that simple prayer, but it really came from somewhere deep. And that is what happened; that day, a tiny bit was lifted. Not a lot. I was suffering horribly, but enough. This opened the door to a spiritual conversion that will take too much space to describe. But, in all this, Journey to Daybreak was such an important book. I read it like a diary — basically one entry per day. I often wondered about Jean Vanier. Now six years later, I have moved back to Miami to care for my sick mother. I ended up with my girls who are now almost college age.
I live very much in the past. I did not prepare myself spiritually for what this involved. I have a lot of responsibility and I do not like it. I am miserable. I have a hard time accepting my situation. It seems as though everything that happened back in Maine is lost, and I therefore, live in the past. I always tell people what happened and how real spirituality is. It is like a war hero stuck in the days of the war, 20 years later.
Then this morning hearing this wonderfully simple phrase on your show (Jean Vanier): "Love reality, don't live in the past on what could have been or should have been etc." Not just accept it, but love it! My reality now is this — a spiritual challenge to love my reality hear in Miami, to care for my mother and my girls without taking tons of prescription meds for this or that.
As I listened to the rest of your conversation with Jean Vanier, tears rolled down my cheeks, but tears of joy at knowing that God persists in keeping me in his fold through coincidental things such as your program this morning about l'Arche. Thank you so much for finding Jean Vanier and talking to him so that we could listen. This was truly the most wonderful Christmas present I could receive.
Daniel Buisson
Miami, FL (WLRN, 91.3 FM)
Touched by His Presence (December 23, 2007)
I was deeply moved by this program. However, Jean Vanier is a reaffirmation of my own "growth" towards compassion. As a teacher, first educated in business, it took me a while to get first through my misunderstanding, fear, to a deeper level of understanding my special students and then, an understanding of myself. When the world is blessed by people such as Vanier, who has reached such a level of understanding and acceptance, it is we who are blessed with being touched by his words and presence.
Diane Pollock
Los Angeles, CA (KPCC, 89.3 FM)
See My Mother Differently (December 23, 2007)
What a marvelous gift to public radio listeners. The true meaning of Christmas: our own vulnerability shook gold by the vulnerability of God, come as an infant, if only we have eyes to see. Thank you for interviewing Jean Vanier, what a marvelous human being. Imagine, if you will, what our lives would be like if we took Vanier's wisdom seriously. I will visit my mother in her nursing home today with new eyes and hopefully a new heart. Thank you.
David Pedersen
Omaha, NE (KIOS, 91.5 FM)
Provocative and Touching (December 23, 2007)
In the dark of early morning, listening to your show, seated near my Christmas tree, a lone candle glowing in the room, I was struck again today by the intelligence and often deep meaning of your programs. On the Sunday mornings I can listen, your show is always provocative and also touching. Krista is one of the best interviewers I've ever heard.
After a career of my own in television I have a certain joy in finally locating an interviewer who prepares and who listens. I have just started downloading your shows, hoping to transcribe them with the intention of sending them to friends. Not being part of an organized religious group, I find the conversations about humanism and spirituality to be my "church." Thanks for your good work.
Nancy Fyffe
Indianapolis, IN (WFYI, 93.9 FM)
Accepting My Own Inadequacies (December 23, 2007)
Your selection of programs on Speaking of Faith are timely, meaningful and inspiring. Your moderator, Krista Tippett, asks such intelligent questions. Today's show on "The Wisdom of Tenderness" forced me to confront my own discomfort in the presence of a disabled person. Whether this stems from my fear of meeting the same fate, lack of acceptance of my inadequacies, or avoidance of looking at my issues of aging and death, the program surely set me on a path of soul searching.
Several other thought-provoking insights: the theology of the body — we are enfleshed people who need the touch of others; the happiness of some mentally disabled people — in their expression of emotion they are the most liberated people I know; the afterlife — a joy to behold, not a scourge to be dreaded. Thank you for putting together the best program to present the most important religious issues of our culture and greatest leaders.
Helen Ayers
Omaha, NE (KIOS, 91.5 FM)
This Is Christmas (December 22, 2007)
In all the stress of the holidays, I forgot what all the celebration is about. I am grateful to Mr. Vanier for bringing me the peace of my Christianity. In all the rush and travails of these difficult times, I forgot that peace of mind lies in people and family outside ourselves. This is Christmas; thank you for bringing Christmas to me and mine again.
Patricia O'Hagen
Rockville Centre, NY (WNYC, 93.9 FM)
Ignoring Christmas (December 21, 2007)
Speaking of Faith is one of my NPR favorites! My question — and I asked it last year as well — why not have someone on to talk about Christmas? There are many scripture scholars who could so a terrific job. Do the producers think it's overdone? So many of us have a childlike/childish notion of what Emmanuel means. Why not update folks? I'm really disappointed in this year's program. It's a marvelous work and Jean Vanier was an outstanding person — that's not the problem. It's like you are ignoring this holy day!
Sue Galagher
Ambler, PA (WHYY, 91.0 FM)
Confront the Deeper Questions (December 20, 2007)
I am enjoying your programs. This is a most luminous man whose vision has traveled, though the program he started is small. Small is big, sometimes. I do believe that what mirrors for us all, in ways we often cannot know, is every act of kindness. I have worked with children and adults who have physical problems of varying degrees, and I always loved them. What is essential is everybody's humanity, and it is that divinity that shines through and can be so augmented with love. We all need to be loved and to be touched. Emotionally and physically is a deep, ongoing human need as so beautifully expressed by this eloquent man of action. Perhaps it is suffering that brings us so often to God. It is certainly an opportunity to heal.
We often confront the deeper questions when we are stopped in the middle of life to examine that void, to meditate, to look deeply into the question: what is meaning and what is this all about? In loving each other we are loving God. I think it is that simple and that complex. The commandment: to love God with all thy heart, with all thy soul and with all thy might can be fulfilled even by those who do not believe in God. Why? Because it is through acts of kindness that we access the Divine in all of us and find solace and meaning. With thanks for another most beautiful program.
Ruth Housman
Newton, MA (Listens to SOF OnDemand)
Show and Tell (December 20, 2007)
Jean Vanier reminds us once again, with profound simplicity, that faith is an act not a doctrine. To our shame, most who will populate Christian churches this Christmas will turn away from that celebration and promptly forget what we saw — the vulnerable God who loves. We will return to the idolatry of the god who smites our enemies and requires orthodoxy. Mr. Vanier doesn't say it because he's too kind, but Jesus of Nazareth made it clear: Shut your mouth and put yourself on the street for the marginalized in this world, for such is the kingdom of God. Anything else is hypocrisy, which Jesus hated most of all. Thank you, for this truly wonderful opportunity to hear a saint speak the truth in love.
Ron George
Corpus Christi, TX (Listens to SOF Podcast)
